black women in the states can't look good without weave and makeup...

Good morning, my lovely blog readers. I do want to take some time out to thank you all for all of the love and support I have gotten on this blog, and thank you for allowing me to open my mind to you. 

Today, I want to reflect my opinion on this: 

I swear, black women can never win. If we wear weave, we don't appreciate our natural beauty. If we put relaxers in our hair, we're trying to be white. If we go natural, we are nappy-headed and don't take care of ourselves. 

For some reason, the belief is that only black women wear weaves or that only black women get perms. If you believe that, you are sadly mistaken. There are many white women and other races who wear weaves, they just call them extensions. Essentially, they are the same thing, you want to extend the length of your hair or the volume of your hair by adding more hair. And many other races, such as white and Dominicans, get perms. The reasoning may be different than a black woman's reasoning, but nonetheless, we aren't the only race that perms their hair. And of course, black women aren't the only race that wears makeup (duh). 

But what I wonder is, why is it always a black woman wants to be something other than black when she wants to change something about herself? Many black women get perms to make their thick, coarse hair more manageable, not to make it more "white". Many black women get weaves just to add lengths to their normal hair, not because they want to "look white". It bewilders me that when a black woman puts extensions in her hair then she's trying to be white, but when a white woman does it, she's just adding volume or adding inches, nothing more and nothing less. When a white woman perms her hair so that it's curly, no one says "Oh, she's making her hair curly. She's trying to be black." All in all, she's usually just trying to make her hair curly. And with the makeup, all women are somewhat bashed if they wear makeup because men are so much more attracted to the natural look now (or as they say...*rolls eyes*). 

My question is: Black or white or anything in between, why can't a woman want to ENHANCE her natural beauty without giving off the idea that she is unhappy with herself? Why can't a black woman want to feel sexy with her long weave blowing in the wind without someone thinking she's trying to be white? Usually, we are just trying to live our lives and love the way we look. Changing your natural beauty would include a woman going to the plastic surgeon and lifting her cheeks or adding some extra boobage. And to each his own to the woman who go to that length. But if a woman isn't doing that and she's just adding inches to her hair or some eyeliner to her eyes, she's not trying to change who she is, she just wants to enhance who she is. And even if a woman wants to go get some surgical work done, whose place is it to tell her it's wrong? If a woman cannot feel happy with herself after doing everything the natural way and she feels like she must do something surgical, why not? It's not a man's life to live, it's a woman's. I always find it disheartening when a man has everything demeaning to say about how a woman chooses to physically carry herself. If she wears a shirt with too much cleavage or leggings and she has a big behind, she's trying to get attention. Too much makeup? She hates the way she looks, she must be ugly under there. Preferences are fine, but making all decisions based off of physical media standards is stupid. A man wants a woman with big breasts, small waist, big behind, but she can't flaunt it because then she's attention-seeking. But if a man has a nice 6-pack and walks around with his shirt off, it's no problem, right? 

So, Idris Elba, to each his own. I'm sure there are African women who perm their hair and wear makeup. And that shouldn't be wrong if they want to do that or not. What is wrong is you generalizing all African women and all American Black women, saying that we are all some way when we are all different. You are also wrong to comment on what a woman should do to feel good about herself, to feel beautiful. You don't know the standards a woman has to live by people to find them attractive, so if a woman must put on some foundation or weave to make HERSELF feel beautiful, then let her be. That's not a man's place to comment. If that's not what you like, fine. Move on. But don't try to chop every woman down at the knees because she isn't what you like. You do you, and let women do them. 

P.S.

I'm sure women do some generalizing towards men as well, but I was speaking from a woman's point of view. Men, please don't be upset. Just try to understand where I'm coming from. 

We are all beautiful. 

Black women in the states can't look good without weave and makeup...hmmm. Oh really? Is that so?

Try again.